AA vs. NA: How I chose a 12 step program
Actually, I don’t see it as a “versus” type of thing. Both fellowships share the same goal and mission: to help the alcoholic/addict who wants to stop using. The only difference really is the language that each fellowship uses. OK and some of the literature is different, too. Oh and how Step work is done. So, there are a few differences.
I sometimes find it difficult, or rather, imprecise, to call myself an alcoholic. That isn’t to say that I think I can drink successfully and just not use other drugs; no, I know that I cannot ever drink. And I don’t want to. In fact, alcohol pretty much disgusts me. I can’t stand the taste, the smell, or the feeling of it. Weird, I know. What I believe is that the allergic reaction to alcohol just happens to be more acute for me than it is for other alcoholics. And for that I am grateful. Now, that isn’t to say I didn’t use to abuse alcohol. I did. But, when it seemed that I could no longer physically tolerate it, I turned to other drugs.
I am an addict. There is no doubt in my mind about that. I used and abused basically every drug out there. I thought, well I can’t drink alcohol like everyone else so I’m entitled to do everything else but drink.
My Early Experience with Fellowship Meetings
While in rehab, I was introduced to both AA and NA. People would bring in meetings to the treatment center I was in. I was a little reluctant to the idea of going to meetings for the rest of my life but I was serious about my recovery and scared to death of going back into the “real world.” I was afraid of relapsing.
I decided I liked the fellowship aspect, being around others who shared the same or similar experiences to me: having had the same thoughts, feelings, beliefs. It was the first time I truly felt a sense of belonging.
What I Like About AA
I like the Big Book. I like the way they tend to do Steps in AA: quick yet thorough. AAers believe that the most beneficial aspect is service so AA sponsors tend to have their sponsees do Step work rather quickly so that they can in turn help the next newcomer. By helping others, we help ourselves. And it is one of the 12 Step Traditions to “give away what was so freely given to us.”
I don’t like that I can’t refer to myself as an “addict” in AA meetings and I can’t talk about drugs and my drug use. In AA, they request that you keep your sharing to drinking-related experiences and problems. I respect this tradition so, when I am in an AA meeting, I do not reference drugs other than alcohol.
What I Like About NA
Basically, I like NA because that is where I feel “at home.” I can talk about being an addict and about the substances I used without feeling like I need to censor myself. I like the literature that NA uses, too.
My Program of Recovery
My home group is NA. My Sponsor is CA. I attend all three types of fellowship meetings: NA, AA, and CA. Again, the most important part of the fellowships is that their mission is to help the alcoholic and/or addict to stop using a substance, or substances, as in my case.
As I mentioned before, I like using the Big Book. Yes, it only mentions alcohol but, I am smart enough to replace the word “alcohol” with the word “heroin” when I am reading the Big Book. It works for both and all substances and even addictive behaviors, such as sex, eating, and shopping
Everything that the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous talks about – the obsession, compulsion, feelings, and behaviors – are all the same for us alcoholics and addicts. Addiction isn’t really about the substance(s) we use; it’s about how we feel inside and why we turn to external things, such as drugs and alcohol, in order to fill a void we sense within.
